Crisis

Yet again, I'm having this feeling of being in a period of crisis.

I'm not faced with alot of deadlines, nor am I busy like shit. But I'm experiencing the mid sch crisis again! =/ It's this time of the year where I don't know what I want and where I am now.
Feeling so unaccomplished and totally undeserving of many things.

Quite tempted to watch The Bucket List. Anyone interested?

Been listening to 933 alot lately. Love the songs they play.

I want KBOX... Anyone... ?

Math

Math - You love it, you love to hate it.

Ever wondered why we had to learn Algebra?
Why must we have Xs and Ys instead of the actual thing or numbers??

Something that I actually asked myself when I was still little. Now that I'm doing economics (a bit ironic, because the math arent that chim.), I realised that many things in life can actually be simplified to an equation. Something that I never learnt when I did math though.

Now Xs and Ys are my good friends. But will everything be simply reduced to variables in my life? Hope not.

OMG. What is this dy/dx thing?
Yeap. Calculus = Differientation + Integration.

Why did we have to learn it?

Why on earth would I want to know why when
y= 2x+ 999
dy/dx = 2

This is even more useful. Rate of change. Marginal. Maximisation, Minimisation.

Enough said I guess.


If only my Little Ben would read my blog, Pls pay attention more when I teach you math, you cannot dislike math.......... especially if you want to be a rocket scientist.

Cravings

I don't know why, but as I was on the bus home just now, I had a severe craving for Coca Cola. So I alighted one stop before my usual stop to get a can from 7-11.

The feeling of satisfying your crave for something is beyond description. I cannot explain the sensation of satisfaction and joy when the cool cola was slipped into my mouth. As it tickles my taste buds, yet another sensation was felt. This time, it made me realised how long I've not drank coke. Slowly, the carbon dioxide starts building up and you have this urge of burping. It feels uncomfortable, but when you finally get to release the gas, the feeling is simply orgasmic.

So now I realise why so many people love coke. It is a very sensual drink that really tickles your sensory system.

Anyway, I felt damn deprived for real food this whole day. All because of the heaps of bread I've eaten.

Random thoughts

I just find certain entity being childish. They denounce certain meetings between other entities and certain religious icon.

This feels almost like a primary school kid conversation, "Oei, you better not talk with them, if not we don't friend you."

Was on the train and saw this 1 chocolate bar in uniform, sitting down, happily chatting on his earpiece, reading his book and trying to look intellectual. But there was this aunty with white locks standing right in front of him who at times was unstable.

Not a very good sight.

EC3303's midterm is suprisingly easy. An open book test that has questions that are very similar to the tutorial questions.

The only down side is that I have to calculate Cov(X,Y), Summation(u^2) etc, which was rather tedious and prone to mistakes.

Damn thick readings for JS this week.

Busy Recess

I'm having a tad too much social activities at the moment. Haha.
This is going to be a busy recess week and I have quite alot of things to do.

Just yesterday I went for Econs Society's gathering at Orchid Park for a game of paintball, didnt win my game, and ended up having bruises and cuts. Haha. But it was quite fun, and got to know some people from it. Met Na and we went National Skin Centre after that, nothing serious with my hands just Eczema. When I opened the Consultant's door, I was taken by surprise because there were 3 people inside. After some introduction, I realised 2 of them are trainee doctors. Quite a friendly bunch of people.

Met up with Joanna in the afternoon and after having lunch in school, we went to our "long awaited, little scandalous date" to Kbox. Haha. Haven't sang in quite sometime. But it was great fun! =) Thanks to my best karaoke partner. Haha.

Met my family for dinner at the coffeeshop, hadn't eaten out on a weeknight for quite sometime. Its about time my grandma took a little well-deserved break.

Went over to Na's place for awhile. Though it was short, its definitely worth it. =)

Coming up next over the next few days, I will be teaching tuition on wed night and sat afternoon. And will be attending a workshop in the place of my NEFMQ head on thurs and fri and have a EA class outing on thurs evening. Haha. Busy me.

And now, I really must study!

Bz bz bz...

It is done! But it didnt turn out as well as I had hope it would be.

I've been to orchard 3 days consecutively. Something that I don't usually do. Haha.

Meeting with the gang was great as usual. Downed my first Tequila shot at Balcony last night. Haha. I think thats the first time I went drinking with the gang. And what a coincidence, saw Jaren at Balcony too.

Met up with Maoliang today to lend him my vcam. And he treated me to Crystal Jade! Haha.

Completed my 3rd JS reaction paper. I wonder how good they are. I don't really have the inspirations to write anything.

ENS Paintball outing + National Skin Centre Appointment tmr. =/

And that marks the start of Recess week!

Interesting Phenomenon.

I've always wonder why this happens.

Whenever a woman pushes a pram into the MRT carriage many eyes will turn and scan the woman, the baby and perhaps her company.

Shortly after, if the baby is adorable, they will smile to themselves or talk amongst themselves while fixing their eyes on the baby.

So here I was observing the carriage I was in today.

When the woman pushing the pram came in with 2 other women. All eyes were moving up and down, scanning the women and the baby.

At least 3/4 of the people at the section of the carriage I was in were looking at the baby and the woman who by my inference is the child's aunt. Observing how she was patting the baby to sleep and smiling to themselves.

I cant help but wonder, what were those people thinking of in their minds then.

And the most amazing thing is that, I saw them on the train as I was heading for my tutee's house. And I saw them again around my neighbourhood when I was on my way home. Haha

寻爱 - Pursuit of Love.

人生就是为了找寻爱的过程，每个人的人生都要找到四个人。

第一个是自己,
第二个是你最爱的人，
第三个是最爱你的人，
第四个是共度一生的人.

但很悲哀的，这三个人通常不是同一个人!

你最爱的，往往没有选择你；
最爱你的，往往不是你最爱的；
而最长久的，偏偏不是你最爱也不是最爱你的，只是在最适合的时间出现的那个人。

在适当的时机，碰到适当的人，叫着幸福。
在适当的时机，碰到不适当的人，叫着错误。
在不适当的时机，碰到适当的人，叫着遗憾。

I've gotten this from Jo.

Don't you agree with it? I know I do.

So many questions on my mind.

So many 'Whys' popping up here and there.

Be it school work or personal life.

I need to find answers to my queries. Else, I'll have to eat eggs for my tests!

Life is just so fragile. People die of illness, old age and accidents.
Another plane just crashed recently, resulting in deaths and injuries. I wonder if it is the result of a decline in standards of pilots? Or is it purely an accident. I cant be certain with investigations still ongoing.

The melting of icecaps seems to be worsening.

"There has been a reduction of the ice cover over the last 10 years of about 100 000 sq. km. (38,600 sq. miles) per year on average, so a drop of one million sq. km. (386,000 sq. miles) in just one year is extreme." (Retrieved from CNA.com)

Will Singapore be submerged? I don't know. Any Geographers keen to answer me? Who knows, Singapore might become one big underwater world in the next century.

Case of CPL Teo.
Major blow to the SAF and Mindef. And with reference to CNA's article:

"Three lapses in the SAF's systems and procedures have been identified concerning the recent incident where a full-time national serviceman walked out of Mandai Hill Camp with his rifle and ammunition during his guard duty, said Defence Minister Teo Chee Hean. "

http://www.channelnewsasia.com/stories/singaporelocalnews/view/300336/1/.html

I believe many heads will roll, not solely with regards to this case per se, but perhaps more of a structural thing. Might involve a major revamp as well.

The Global Economy is going haywire.

More accurately, it should be the stock market rather than the economy.(At least for now.) With so much speculators of the stock market, people react to every little comment made by certain important people. If people were to get information regarding the funds rate, the stock market will fluctuate yet again.


Sometimes, life makes fools out of men.
And most of the time men fools around with life.

Dinner.coffee.movie

Met up with Chi, Edgar, Jack and Qiyang for dinner at Fish and Co last night. As usual, they never fail to say, "Make that 2, ...3...." Haha. I've always found that interesting. As usual, my order was quite different from the group.

Dinner was accompanied by conversations, entertainment by our ever entertaining WSO and the confusion of the mixed identities between cheese and salt.

After dinner, we went to the Cathay to check out what movie to watch. After a battle of Scissors, paper, stone, it was decided that we watch "The Invasion". Prior to the movie, we went to Starbucks for some coffee.

The Invasion is quite interesting, apart from the fact that it was Nicole Kidman who is the lead, I found the whole thing quite engaging. Started me thinking.

A World without Crime. How ideal. But then again, this requires some philosophical discussion, which I rather not to engage in.

Back to studying/doing assignments.

Yet another week has gone.

The feeling is just so different.

Work load hasn't increased by alot relative to the previous sem, however the content is definitely much more difficult.

Presentation over for now, not the best of presentations, but it really has been awhile since I presented anything.

Finally submitted a reaction paper for JS, and seriously, writing a 250 word paper is much more tedious then writing a 1000 word one. Being concise and precise is definitely not my forte. I can't show off my extraordinary skills at beating about the bush!

Been thinking about minors, still considering what to minor in. Perhaps I shall stick to my original plan of doing a Management Minor, who knows, I might even upgrade to a 2nd major in Mgmt, or even an ad hoc DDP B.Soc.Sci(Hons) Econs + B.B.A. Haha. Wishful thinking.

Genes and society slowly getting on track. Mugging from the textbook is definitely helpful when your lecturer is going too fast for you.

Although initially I was apprehensive about being in EA1101, I kind of enjoy being in the class. Mainly because of the people there, nice friendly people. I forgot who told me this, but seriously I think that, "Its the company that matters most, and not where you are." is damn true. Of course, I must admit that my grammar has improved tremendously.

Attended Iman's wedding after my tuition, didn't stay for long because the only people there that I know apart from Iman, is Hairul and a couple of Charlie men. Could see that he is happy and much more mature. Seeing him get married is really something that makes me happy. Still remembered the time when Ben and I got him to cut our hair. Haha. Those were the days.

Went for a super extended family gathering yesterday and finally saw my Aunt who is currently a lecturer in one Ireland Uni. Haven't seen her for almost 10 years, and now that I talked to her, I realised that lecturers there aren't earning alot. But so long as she is enjoying herself there, I guess money isn't of fundamental importance.

Finally done with tutorials on a Sunday afternoon for once. Haha. Gives me more time to do some revision and prepare for the upcoming lectures.

Still contemplating on joining something, be it in school or outside. However even with these comtemplations, I have no real idea what is the driving force behind all these desire.

Perhaps it is not for the interest per se, but more of beautifying my curriculum vitae.

Finally, a little digression towards Joanna, I'm damn happy for you now la! Glad that you found bliss and happiness in him. =) All the best for your honours year.

Thoughts.

Was listening to 93.3FM and I heard this story from Mary.

There was a man who is always feeling troubled about the things happening around him.

One day, he went to a sage to seek his enlightenment on how to relieve himself from those feelings.

The sage brought him to an abandoned house.

Sage: On the table lies a glass of water, despite being left alone here to collect dust for many years, it is still crystal clear. Why is this so?

After some deep thoughts, the man responded.

Man: I know! It is because the dust are all settled at the base of the glass.

Sage: Yes, that's right.

In life, there are many events, people or relations that are very difficult to forget. Instead of forcing yourself to forget them, keep them in mind. However, let them settle to the bottom and remain calm. Concentrate on the other things in life. Don't start stirring them up, and cloud up the glass of water. Let them be a reminder to you, but don't let them be the cause of your unhappiness and the source of your troubles.

Like the glass, if there is no force shaking it, the dust will always be settled at the base.


Sorry about the bad translation. It was in mandarin. Haha

Ratatouille

Well, I caught Ratatouille with Na just now. Its a really fun show. =)

"Anyone CAN COOK."

Its pretty inspiring to know that Remy, has such aspirations and dreams of becoming one of the finest chefs in Paris.

So, I shall use Remy the rat as a role model! Onward and beyond! Haa

But speaking of food, I haven't been cooking for quite some time apart from cooking instant noodles/ campbell's soup.

Been thinking, for SMEs to function, do they operate similar to MNCs? I mean in organisation and employer-employee relationship. I strongly feel that in order for SMEs to function well, and reach the optimum level of efficiency/output, the have to command loyalty from their staff. Once you manage to capture the hearts and minds of your employees, they will put in their heart and soul for you. Why pick on little things that aren't even worth mentioning? For an employee who has worked in your company for almost 10 years without a single day of absence, and he tries his best to make it happen even regarding your personal stuff, I seriously think you are losing it. But people are like that, they won't feel the pain until they fall.

Alright, tonnes of tutorial to rush. Sleepless night.

一人一半

一人一半，感情不散。
一人一素故，感情才会久。

*Note: 素故 = 四分之一

This is a portion of the lyrics of one of the favourite songs of Singaporeans from the local production, 881.

Come to think about it, it does make certain sense. Don't you all agree? Especially the army dudes.

Clear IPPT.

Yeah. As what QY said, one shot one kill. I managed to clear my IPPT in one go. Initially I wasn't very confident about it, because when I was practising my SBJ this morning at home, I couldn't even clear 216.

I am quite impressed with the electronic ippt system, it really saves alot of time. Well, since we could choose which station to attempt first, I decided to go for the killer - SBJ. And Ta da, my first jump was 221, and immediately I became excited, haha so and for my 2nd jump I hit 225. Yay, that was a great morale booster. And of course subsequent stations weren't much of a problem.

2.4 wasn't that bad either. Although still a long way from gold, but at least my timing was way better than the previous trials that I did myself. But I am happy that its over and now I just have to maintain this level of fitness at least. And of course I am happy with the silver.

Saw Rizuan (My MG Gunner) there. Surprised that he was there for RT since he is always of gold standard, and found out that he never go and take. Don't understand some people nowadays.

And guess what, I kena bird shit on my hand yet again. Tell me how lucky/unlucky I am la. Some people never kena bird shit before in their whole life and yet, in my 22years of life I had been bombed 4 times. And guess what, all 4 times landed on the same forearm. I am starting to wonder if there is an invisible target board there. Furthermore, this is the 2nd time I struck the lottery at that place, there are about 20+ people waiting to cross the road at that junction, but the bird have to choose me. Looks like I AM the chosen one.

Whining aside, I did see weird drivers today as well. A P-Plated car started doing its U-turn when the green man came up (its red light for him) and when all the pedestrians started to cross the road? The main problem is, he didnt give a damn that people were crossing? He just continue driving as if we were all invisible and we had to give way to him. Sadly I didn't have time to catch his car plate. Next, just immediately after the green man stopped blinking, a taxi started driving off when the light was still red. =/ I think they really need to wake up their idea.

The week that past so quickly

Last week really went by so quickly. Probably because I was busy for almost every day and night.

Attended 3 dragon boat trainings over the week, 2 land and 1 water. I must say, it is a really good sport and the training is tough but yet enjoyable. However the commitment level is also as high.

On days without competitions, the training is usually 4 times per week, and when competition is round the corner, it ups to 5 days. Although I enjoy it quite alot, I think my priorities in NUS is to study hard and get good grades. So I have decided to stop joining their trainings. I think fun, enjoyment and satisfaction can be obtained at a lower cost. But I'm really glad to have attended and experienced the sport personally.

Modules this semester don't look very promising. I suspect I might fall quite far off from my targeted CAP region.

Genes and Society is a killer. First lecture and I dont know what the heck my lecturer is saying already.

Buddy - I need you A level Biology text book. Haha.

And while looking through Macro economics and Econometrics, I almost thought I was taking mathematics modules.

Celebrated Augustin's birthday in advance on saturday evening, he is really much cuter compared to his brother, haha. But then both are my cousins, so I guess I cant be biased. Equal love for both of them then.

Drove for abit too, getting slightly rusty.

But at least over the weekend I caught Secret with Na, I am really impressed with how Jay wrote the story. Its really something special. I am quite touched by the whole thing.

Gelare was nice! Papering was not too bad, and of course the Ji Dan Zai was good too!

Alright, I guess its time for me to read my Intro to Biotechnology Text.

Water Training.

Well, first water training went quite alright I suppose. Not too tiring, but my technique is pretty bad. I should enjoy this sport. =)

End of week 1.

Its not easy trying to get back into the studying mood after a 3 month break.

But as what Jack said, Nil Sine Labore - Nothing Without Labour.
Yep, I got to work very hard. Especially since I am starting to feel some modules aren't as easy to score as I initially thought they would be.

But hey, I'm trying hard to keep up with the readings.

Which brings me to another point.

Dragon boat training is 3 to 5 times a week (Mostly 4 times). Am I able to maintain my CAP by joining such a high commitment sports? (If I get through the selection.)

Troubled.

Happy National Day.

Happy 42nd Birthday Singapore!

You are a miracle.
So proud to call myself a Singaporean.


Many things happened recently. Be it internationally, regionally, locally or even within my own life. Thought through quite alot of stuff and was wondering what I am looking for in life. Sometimes it is just so confusing with so many things going on around you.

At this point in time, my main concern is to ultimately get a good honours.
With that it could lead to me fulfilling my dreams in the far future.

There are so many things I want to do, some of them seems so out of reach. But nonetheless, not impossible. Also, so many things that I keep telling myself that I will buy when I get my first official paycheck after graduation. So many that I probably need 5k per month to buy all within the first month. Haha.

Lets see what I want to accomplish/get:
Before graduation
Complete Standard Chartered Half Marathon 2007 at a timing better than my previous AHM.
Represent NUS in some DB competition.
Maintain if not improve my CAP.
Complete my first ever full Marathon by 2008.
Grab an internship at one of the banks in Singapore especially the central bank.
Graduated with a 2nd Class Upper.
Write the honours thesis. - to see if I am cut out for research work.
Pick up roller blading. - At least I want to know how to brake.
Go back to swimming.
Cherish my friends more.
Pick up diving. - I so want to see marine life up close.

After graduation
Going on my first Europe Trip.
Secure a good job.
Buy a DSLR camera. - Fulfil my wish to capture the beautiful images of the world.
Carry on leading a healthy lifestyle.
Buy a car.
Get a Ph.D. - It all depends on my results and whether I have any interest in research at that point in time.
Work in an International Organisation.
Teach at my Alma Mata. - Only if my title is Dr.
Keep contact with my friends. - Something which I am damn lousy at.
Marry the love of my life.

Guess this is enough of what I want to do/ achieve for 1 day.

I think its always good to review what you want in life once in awhile to keep you going on without losing focus.

Gearing up for Ippt.

Yikes. I thought the long distance training recently might have helped me with my 2.4 timing. There was some help alright, but not sufficient. Feels like I have neglected the speed component totally in my recent training. As I was striding, I could feel the calfs aching and aching, that was during the morning and I thought it was because I wasnt warmed up enough. I tried running again in the evening. This time with an additional warm up round prior to my run. The result, a faster timing, but an equally sore calf.

Oh well, its time for some fart lek training to increase my speed.

Somehow it feels more shag to finish 2.4km then to finish 14km.

Think I finally got the technique for SBJ. Just needs more practice and doing some tuck jumps, lunges should do the trick.

Chin up isn't a problem at this point in time, except that I experienced a very smooth bar at YCK Stadium which is pretty frictionless with sweaty palms. Haha.

Alright my new aim in life is to evolve into a fitness freak! Haha. - Not manhunt style, but rather live strong, enjoy sports.